Bestest friends ever!


I'm so thankful for the math girls! Knowing that in one year my uni life will be different beyon imagination without them just sucks the soul out of me. The friendship within The math girls are not the easiest to build but we made it. Two years before we can take like bffs! Honestly not easy hen we all have our own lives. I wish we could live the rest of uni and work life together. You guys are the bestest gift that provides me strength to fight the battles of uni. I hope we stay close Til we get married, get kids and die:p

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treasures


its scary to see how closely related those people that have recently passed on are to me. Most are within 2 degrees probably? I'm glad nothing happen to A. Like, honestly I thank God for honoring the family prayers and my prayers every single time you book in and we really mean it when we say take care. All these made me realize how important little words are and we shouldn't take them lightly. N still jokes about how I should treasure him! You jolly well take care when you leave also understand! hahahs told you a million times already in whatsapp. Life is so fragile that there are mroe important things to be do than be worried and caught up with finding love or pursuing your own dreams regardless of others. I don't waznna comtinue talking about all these coz it will lead to a long post. Just, gotta learn to trust God and pray;with faith and perseverence like before.

Apr. 13th, 2012


I gotta study! I gotta smile!(: (: (:

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Apr. 4th, 2012


Super happy for the a div girls!(: can't wait to
Finally watch the school on the final day! Plus now we have field events and we got forth! Awesome!(: apparently we changed coached. Seems like Mr Fan is doing quite a good Job for the team(: woohoo! Exciting! Trackers are so bonded too! So happy for them!!!

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frog attack!


a frog attacked me during my run! in the hope of not killing it, i tried avoiding it but i think it kinda panicked too so it anyhow jumped and i fell]: it came out unharmed in this friendly battle but i got slight bruises]: mel 0: frog 1. HAHAHAHAHHA. froggie so cute(: havent smiled the whole day except at this stupid frog. cant wait for tmr! wishing for the best for the team at nationals! woohoo! cant believe they made it to finals! so proud of them(,:

Apr. 1st, 2012


for the past 2 weeks i've been trying to call you to talk but you are busy or something. you reply my lesser, dont really bother about me even throughout the happenings in my family the last few weeks and you'd rather game than console me. It's not my fault that I go out and find comfort in someone else. You're going korea soon and you dont even seem to be bothered about not being able to talk to me or whether I need the encouragement for my exams. you dont bother right? you dont even know what my timetable is like and someone who barely knows me can memorize my timetable, know who I am going out with and whether I am home safely. You dont even wanna tell me whats up with your life now. I try to ask and you just dont reply for a really long time before changing topic. if you dont reply, there's always a valid reason but when i dont because i got dance or something, its still  my fault. you totally forgot about us going cycling today. you dont even surprise me or bother about our anniversaries. its not my fault that someone else can make my smile more. yet i know i will regret it if i make any rash decisions now. i just need one person close to me to tell me to end all these and i would. i probably realized it too late that no one really bothers now when i say how neglected i feel. i dont even feel like i can engage in a proper conversation with you if i meet you. not that you will actually bother meeting me anyway. you're fine with your girlfriend not telling you anything about her life;not talking, not meeting up. you totally forgot about our outing. i thought if i went along with what you wanted to do, you would remember;but you didnt. I'm gonna control myself and stop clicking your phone number anymore. 

To my newest best friend if you didn't know!


You made me smile the whole freaking night!(: you made my heart melt too! You made my day and brought as much chaos to my heart. Let's stay friends for the rest of our lices(: what say you dear stranger?(: thanks for everything! The calls off your busy schedule/ pile of whatever eqns and hmk that students have to go through just because you know I'm not fine and I need to talk because SMS just cannot express what I am going through. Thanks for forcing me to open up to you for the many times when I say I am fine, smile like mad and yet you see through all my facades. I don't know hay magical angelic power you possess and I don't wanna know because that keeps me intrigued(as quoted from someone!). Thanks for always going the extra mile and pushing your luck in everything when it comes to me! Sorry fr disappointing you countless times! thanks for showing me your really lovable childish side with your pets and for simply being my strongest pillar of support! With friends like you everywhere around me, I hope you finally understand why I don't wanna get into a position of risk when I can make a risk less profit just having this circle of friends! don't try to push your luck anymore though please! In a good way! Nothing is gonna come out of it! And should you one day decide to walk away, I hope you know that you have won yourself a bestie place in my heart for eternity!

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Being thankful always in Christ(:


Thank you for the food we eat
Thank you for the birds that sing
Thank you for the gadgets
Thank you for the friends that stay
Thank you for the job opportunities
Thank you for the honor of studying
Help me to thank You for everything(:
There is nothing short changed if I place my life with You!

Therefore I smile for I have You(:

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Giving you a taste of your own medicine


Life has been bad. Year 2 sem 2. I did averagely for one module and below average for the rest. Wow. For someone who used to be way above average, this is unacceptable. It's as if I deserve to be banished to hell. Tear have been shed; weight has been gained. I'm so glad for close friends to listen to my blabber non stop when I'm upset just to help me resist the urge to cry. Seriously world, give me shit and I am gonna get back at you. Just you wait and see. I have done that to subsets of the world and if you wanna throw me a bigger piece of shit, so be it. I take you on and I will make you regret it. I'm not gonna let you win. I'm a champion coz my God is bigger than you, older than you, and He can outsmart you anytime. Just you wait and see; He will own you up down left right centre. Give me back my life. Give me the ability to sit in the canteen for the whole day to study what I really want to study. Take me back to my home where studying was purely because I enjoyed learning more about my passion. I wanna run in competitions, play frisbee in muddy fields, cry and run oxygen deprived staircases; or even sitting in the super smelly pantry and yanking open dormitory gates. I miss Loving the company of my international friends. I miss them. Foreigners in uni are not even a bit like them in any way. My dear friends all over the world, if you can even think of me once in a while, please do because I am missing you so badly. I am gonna run the race and finish it well. I'm not gonna let the world overwhelm me.

Lord help me to rely on you just like before. Let me acknowledge you in all that I do and continue to be the shining beakon of hope and restoration to those around me.i love you Max out!(:

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The Blessed 2011


I had a very exciting 2011! I cannot really recall the previous years but I know that 2011 was full of ups and downs. Firstly, by God's grace, I got into QF. I know how everyone probably have heard me say this like, a million and one times but honestly, I'm thankful beyond words. Hence I keep repeating myself. The first semester ain't the easiest journey but somehow, in my weakness, I am made strong. I've learnt to hang on to God's promises for me, even when the situation seems dire. I have thought of settling for the easier path many times. I'm glad I have not done so and I hope I will never ever give up on the  good things God have blessed me with. I really miss taking modules with the og but some things cannot be stopped. 

Next came the break up. Well, now I am still not sure how long it would go even when it's complicated and stuffs. If anyone ask me, I only cannot handle one thing about him. It's that one thing that made us break up. I'm still struggling to get through it as much as it seems like I have. I'm praying for the best and submitting my future into God's hands just like what I did with my education from High School til now. 

Also, I've moved to another church. I have yet to make it official to those who bother in MCI, but most of them actually know. I'm glad for this new group of friends, except that Josephine and Chye Wei are leaving for SEP! Somehow, I'm feeling sad about being unable to attend CG anymore for the next semester even though I've only attended 1 CG that wasn't really bible study. Wednesday we're probably having CG at the airport to send the two girls off! Super far. I don't want to go, but I think i eventually still would. 

What else is there? I probably can't remember but I know I have no regrets(: with regards to my life at least. I do have one regret though. My closest friends are not going to church/in a relationship with God. I know most of them know who God is, been to church before, and so on. I just want them to know God like, personally? EVERYONE I invited to church were overseas or just somehow had something to reason their attendance away. All I want is to spend Christmas with close friends and the God of my life together. Just a simple wish that is so difficult to ever come true. I just want someone who can be so close to me in church! I don't want a new close friend from church. I just want a close friend now to be with me. I'm stubborn, I'm spoilt, whatever people may say, that's exactly what I want. Why must I settle for other close friends that I know probably cannot be as close to me as these people who know me inside out? Okay, I shall not be angsty anymore. I want to be the one who does not do the asking. Why can't people ask me out instead of me doing it? It's one thing to say I'm a close friend and another thing to show it altogether. I hope I will be appreciated just that little bit more. I want them to be able to know what I mean when I say I am so freaking grateful to God for everything given to me, not because they know that He is a God but I want them to be able to feel my joy that only comes with them experiencing it themselves! I do cry and scream and shout at God when I am down too. I'm not some amazing being so do not think that I'm just a lucky happy person. 

I'm going to end abruptly! If not I'll rattle on and on and on. He made all things NEW. That's why we all celebrate NEW year. Else, why are you celebrating, going crazy just because the year changed? What makes this day so special that makes people wanna change?

Happy New Year my dears(: